Brake Lights
by bare-footed-muse
Summary: Kristoff's journey through the Whiteout in a car, not on the back of a reindeer. Traffic jams, traction problems, ring roads and road rage ensues. A really, really silly little modernAU that just wouldn't get out of my head.


**Notes:**

I do a lot of driving for work. Sitting in a traffic jam the other day, late as usual and cursing fluently, a really silly idea for a oneshot came to me and just wouldn't leave me alone until I wrote it. Featuring all the things I hate about driving, FiveDoorHatchback!Sven, and the joys of windscreen wipers in heavy snow. Truly ridiculous.

Hordaland is just the region of Norway that Bergen is in.

* * *

Kristoff put his foot down.

As the tarmac disappeared beneath the wheels of the car, he flicked the radio on for distraction.

 _Go back._

 _No_ , he told himself firmly. _No. She'd with her true love. Her fiancée._

Kristoff gripped the steering wheel a little tighter and willed himself to focus on nothing but the last few bars of the radio's song and the road ahead.

"What a tune. You're listening to Hordaland Radio, and it's just coming up to eleven o'clock. We'll be right back after the news."

Kristoff drummed his fingers on the steering wheel.

"Thanks, Eugene. The unseasonable weather Arendelle has been experiencing is just getting worse, as reports of a blizzard are coming in…"

Kristoff's hands were suddenly sweaty on the steering wheel. He turned the radio up.

"…recommending that those thinking of travelling in or out of Arendelle stay at home and rearrange those plans. Residents of Arendelle are being told to stock up on provisions and stay in their homes until the weather eases – "

"Anna," he muttered, horror-struck.

Kristoff glanced in each of his mirrors. There was no-one behind him. He looked forward. There was no-one coming towards him.

He squealed into a three-point turn – of course, halfway through, three cars appeared and as he wriggled through the turn, Kristoff held his hand up in apology multiple times – and sped off back towards the gathering storm clouds over Arendelle.

He slammed the breaks on for a speed camera – he didn't see a flash, so hopefully he'd got away with it –

As soon as he passed the sign – ' _Welcome to Arendelle, a city of opportunity_ ' – the snow began. Gentle at first, he flipped on the windscreen wipers; as he drew closer to the town, it fell down thicker and faster. Kristoff hit the button for the screen heater and twisted a few dials to send blasts of hot air up the windscreen.

He reached the roundabout. Left would take him onto the ring road and straight over was the windy route through the old town.

A moment of indecision.

"Ring road," he muttered decisively, revving perhaps more than was necessary as the car in front faltered continuously in its attempts to pull out between cars pouring from the right. "Come on, come on! Go!"

The car in front of him faltered again.

"You could have gone then, you stupid – "

Finally, he roared out onto the roundabout and took the third exit. Ahead, he could see the weather worsen still and braced himself for the ice and snow on the road.

"Come on, buddy. You got this." He slapped the steering wheel. "Come on!"

Visibility was appalling. Kristoff again turned up the radio, listening desperately for any updates, straining to see past the car's frantic wipers and the sheets of white bearing down upon the town.

Brake lights.

Kristoff swore.

"Nonono, come on – "

He couldn't see how far ahead the queue stretched, but it couldn't be far, surely, who would be out driving in this weather –

The traffic moved forward achingly slowly.

Kristoff fumbled for his phone, and glancing between its little screen and the car in front, called the number Anna had keyed in the previous day.

 _"The person you are calling is currently unavailable, please try again la – "_

"Come _on_ , Anna," he growled. "Pick up!"

 _"The person you are calling is currently unavailable, please try again la – "_

Kristoff swore and leaned on his horn.

Enough fighting the traffic.

He came off at the first exit, trying desperately to navigate via frosted signs and roads which seemed almost alien under increasing layers of snow. He could cut through the industrial area, over the hill and get to the back of the estate –

Suddenly, the tyres started spinning, losing all purchase –

"Nonono, come on, Sven, you can do it – "

It was no good. The snow was too thick and the little car was helpless.

Kristoff leapt out, digging out the tyres with his hands, but under the snow was ice, and that was no better –

The car let out a whine. In alarm, Kristoff glanced at the engine temperature gauge – it still seemed stable, and it could be his imagination that the little needle was dropping down, but –

"No no no, come on boy, stay with me – "

He revved the engine a few times, and put it into first once more.

The car strained and wheels spun, but it was no good –

The engine spluttered and gave out.

 _"Sven!"_

Frantically, Kristoff tried to start the engine again. It ticked over a few times, but he could hardly hear it over the wind and snow –

Suddenly, with a huge rev from the engine, the car choked back to life again.

Kristoff felt a huge surge of relief. "Good boy!"

After a few more unsuccessful attempts to shift the car, Kristoff accepted defeat and killed the engine, locked the doors and – stumbling and slipping on the layers of ice and snow – ran in what he hoped was the direction of Anna's family estate.


End file.
